Jews & Royalty

Panini’s ‘Rabbis Of The World’ collection failed to match the popularity of ‘Euros 2012’

What follows is the gut wrenching transcript of Chief Rabbi Jonathan Sack’s ‘Thought For The Day’ transmitted on Radio 4 in the run up to the Jubilee’s Nuremberg style propaganda exercise. Now, I’m not Jewish but I do have distant relatives from Cheetham Hill in the tailoring business. Maybe there are some Jews who believe that their ‘community’ exists as a seperate ethnic or ‘racial’ group rather than simply a religious preference. But then there are some people who believe in Aryans,  Nubians, Scousers and bigfoot. 

The descendants of Shem may lay claim to a land and a God that say is theirs by right or by origin but that’s their shtick. Yes, I know that Hitler and other racist nutters saw them as ‘other’ as ‘sub-human’ and killed Jews in their millions but they were self-deluded too and refused to believe that both the Germans and the Jews were descended from the same bunch of monkey fucking cavemen. 

What most ‘Jews’ if they call themselves such, should be offended by are people like the chief rabbi who claim to speak for all of them. Big Jews, small Jews, white Jews, black Jews, ginger Jews, gay Jews, Jews for Jesus and Jews for Palestine, orthodox and progressive, Zionist and Communist. In all the gallons of revisionist, sycophantic spew that we had wade through the other week, this struck as by far the most toe curlingly creepy.  

“Among my first memories, I was four at the time, was of Her Majesty becoming the Queen. My father went out to buy a television – a huge piece of furniture with a tiny screen – so that we could watch the coronation. In my first days at school we were taught the national anthem and I can remember thinking that the words “long to reign over us” were about the weather, which was why England was so wet.

Start with a joke, Johnny. Reign/Rain – you’re no Lenny Bruce but this’ll have em eating out of your hand.  

She reigned, I thought, exceptionally well, and so she has in the true sense for sixty years. Jews are intensely loyal to the Queen. Every week in synagogue we say a prayer for her and her family. Each time we see her in person we say a special blessing, and tomorrow we’ll be saying a special prayer for the diamond jubilee.

Well speak for yerself Sacksy. I’m sure there are plenty of jews (and gentiles of course) who despise the queen and the royal family. Ah but you’re one of the special people who see her in person. Oooh get you! Not that you’re in any way boastful, as that would be bad form for a humble chief rabbi. Why do you say a special blessing anyway? What has the queen ever done for you?

Two thousand years ago the rabbis said, pray for the welfare of the monarch for were it not for respect for him or her, people would eat one another alive.

Ah, so it’s all monarchs not just the protestant christian Anglican jew murdering monarchs of England. Gotta love them royals eh? King David himself was a King after all and Kings are really great people. If it wasn’t for kings and queens we’d all be cannibals and that’s a scientific fact dating way back to the time of the Pharoahs and the Caesars who were such nice people.

Strong words; but ones Jews and others feel in their very bones. My late father came here from Poland. My mother’s family came from Lithuania. Had Britain not let them in they would have died in the Holocaust, and I would never have been born. For us Britain’s tolerance and traditions of fairness aren’t something we take for granted. They are the very things that allow us to live without fear. And they are embodied, personified in her Majesty the Queen.

OK, they MAY have died in the holocaust and probably WOULD have but y’know Britain didn’t go to war to save the Jews or defend democracy, they went to war because they HAD to, because they had economic interests to defend. This British ‘tolerance’ also applies to other nations y’know and what’s so good about ‘tolerance’ anyway, is tolerance defined as not gassing someone? Yay for UK! And if ANYONE personifies tolerance it’s her majesty, that very tolerant woman who spends so much time tolerating her kids and grandkids and normal non-royal people.    

For most of us she’s the human face of national identity, the unifying presence at the heart of British life, to whom we feel loyalty whichever way we vote, and regardless of class, colour, culture or creed. It was intensely moving on Tuesday of this week in the House of Lords to hear Jewish, Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Sikh and Zoroastrian peers speak of how much she means to each of our communities, and we need that unifying presence all the more, the more diverse we become.

This is the WindsorPLC ‘communities of all faiths’ we’re all in it together strategy. Listen, we know there are some killjoy lefties out there and that by having the queen as head of the state church, it could maybe look as if all those horrid catholics and muslims and jews and darkies might not love her as much as every single right-thinking white person but that’s a lie because EVERYONE  Loves Raymond. Make sure you put that in your speech ‘Lord’ Sacks, that’s why we made you the nation’s Top Jew.   

For sixty years the Queen has spoken gently to the better angels of our nature. Hers has been the quiet heroism of service, the dignity of dedication to the common good, the good that’s so much bigger and nobler than self interest.

Bleeeeeurrrggggghhhhh! I’m 46 years of age the Queen has NEVER once spoken gently to the better angels of MY nature (no doubt because I don’t have any). Define ‘heroism.’ Define ‘dignity.’ Define ‘dedication.’ (that’s whay you need, if you want to be the best, if you want to beat the rest!). I’ll give you a thousand names from my own life who have displayed all these qualities more manifestly than the queen. As for self-interest. The queen’s not self-interested? No way, she gets out of bed because she loves YOU.   

She makes us a little better than we might otherwise have been.

Listen mate, she may have made YOU a little better than you might otherwise have been. I’d have been the same snarly, militant bastard with or without her lad.

A third century rabbi used to say: where you find greatness there you find humility, and that has been her Majesty’s greatness. May God bless her, for she has truly blessed us.

Another rabbi used to say ‘I am humble of heart, you can only get to God through me’ so let’s go easy on the humility eh? You can be great and humble, only if others say iit’s so, otherwise that would look like boastfulness and self-interest and we know her Majesty isn’t in it for the castles and the mansions and the holidays and the cars and the feasts and the servants and the adulation and the parades and the ribbon cutting and the millions and millions and millions hoarded away in offshore bank accounts. No way, only a cynic would say that. God may bless her but that’s His problem.

Maybe J-Sac’s just too assimilated to notice that the Windsors haven’t always been massive fans of his tribe and that far from being the embodiment of good old British tolerance and fair play, the royals and their paymasters in the city kind of enslaved millions of people and stole their land much as the Egyptians and the Babylonians and the Greeks and the Romans enslaved and exploited Judea way back in the day.


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